Ramble On

... 'cos still so much is left unsaid. My intentions are clear. I write purely to vent. It is poetic justice that I find such a beautiful song to go along.

Leaves are falling all around,
Its time I was on my way.
Thanks to you, Im much obliged
For such a pleasant stay.

I leave with nothing but pleasant memories. Of what should have been. Some bitter thoughts, but nothing against you. It is the bitterness from the situation that leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Who's to blame then? Isn't you, isn't me, is it things that I can't see? Does not really matter. The end result is disastrous any which way. I think I should've known better than to go down the same road again; but I've made mistakes, I'm just a man. Everybody does. The important part is to not keep brooding over it and move on. I know my time has come and I thank you for the memories; self-constructed nevertheless. If there is one thing I should learn, it is to not take anything for granted before I move on.

But now its time for me to go,
The autumn moon lights my way.
For now I smell the rain,
And with it pain,
And its headed my way.
Ah, sometimes I grow so tired,
But I know Ive got one thing I got to do,

I can't stay in the same place any longer. I did. I waited long enough. You always tried my patience and you always won. Think about it. Did you win or did you lose? Did you enjoy testing my patience knowing that I spent sleepless nights with but the one thing on my mind? You never really cared. You always played me for a fool. What was that thing I said before? Ahh yes, I should not have taken things for granted. How naive of me. I should have seen things straight. My love for you never let me do that. There. I just said I love you. Was this what you were waiting for? I couldn't say this all along because I feared my love would go unrequited. But now there is no hope. Losing all hope is freedom. It's only when you have lost everything that you are free to do anything. Someone has rightly said love is blind. I'd like to add on - love makes people stupid. Ofcourse I was wrong. How did I let emotions win over my rational mind? That's what happens in love, no place for logic. Didn't I just mention love makes people stupid? Oh great, hindsight is 20/20 vision indeed.

I do smell the rain. You know how I hate the rains. It's been raining since you left me and now I'm drowning in the flood. You always knew how to break through my defenses. Always left me tattered and torn. Did you take a look at yourself in the mirror then? Who's shattered now? I know this pain that's headed my way. I've been through it once and I'm ready for it again. It won't bother me so much this time around. It's been but my only companion over the last few years. Infact we are quite fond of each other now. I feel ashamed for having walked out on you though. Your pain was a stranger to me and I do not have the time now. Because there's one thing I need to do ...

Ramble on,
And nows the time, the time is now
To sing my song.
Im goin round the world,
I got to find my girl, on my way.
Ive been this way ten years to the day, ramble on,
Gotta find the queen of all my dreams.

Got no time to for spreadin roots,
The time has come to be gone.
And tho our health we drank a thousand times,
Its time to ramble on.

I'm leaving on a jet plane, don't know when I'll be back again. I need to get far far away from this place that invokes all memories of you and I. You and I, not us. There never was an us. It hurts. But nobody said it was easy. I can't be stuck in the same place for too long. You know how familiarity breeds contempt. My contempt gets delivered overnight. And I owe it to myself to get the hell outta here. I have nothing to dwell on. I've learnt my lessons, I'll live through the pain. I'm young. Got a whole life ahead of me. I'm gonna go half the way across the globe and find my girl. I hope you find the strength to pull yourself out of that hole too. I don't have anymore energy to try and lift you out. One word of commitment from you and I would have gladly died waiting. You just never had any intentions for me, never gave me a chance to prove myself.

I aint tellin no lie.
Mines a tale that cant be told,
My freedom I hold dear;
How years ago in days of old
When magic filled the air,
Twas in the darkest depths of mordor
I met a girl so fair,
But gollum, and the evil one crept up
And slipped away with her.
Her, her....yea.
Aint nothing I can do, no.

You know I never lied. You know I never cried. But the thought of you and I not being able to make it till the end of our lives brought a million tears to my eyes and I cried a river. Did you know you had so much power in you? What was that line? No woman is worth your tears; if she is, she won't make you cry. I guess there is some truth to that after all. Too bad I chose to ignore conventional wisdom. And now that I know what I need, I also know what I can't have. And I can't tell anyone what it is. I can't proclaim my failure with any hint of self-respect left. My only saving grace is, I know I gave it all I had. God knows I gave it all I had. But it really is about winning and not how you play the game. Such talk is best left for the losers' locker rooms.

Gollum struck just when I wasn't there. Oh who am I kidding. I was never there. I thought I was, but I found out I was living in my own dreams. Gollum cast such a spell on you that you chose not to see beyond him. Such a shame then that while you cry in despair over Gollum I cry for you. Ofcourse I couldnt care less for Gollum, may his tribe burn in hell. But I did care for you. Too bad for you, you never realised what you could be missing on. But now it's all gone. Come to think of it, you still are in a better position. Atleast your feelings were reciprocated. Imagine how lowly I feel. But I guess I had to learn this the hard way and I'll do what it takes to get over this. I hope you too will find the srength to pull yourself out of this self-inflicted misery. Forgive me, if you may, for not being there in your time of need. I do wish you well. Now we can never get what could have been, but what we had will remain till eternity. And now, there's only one thing left for me to do ..

Ramble on,
And nows the time, the time is now
To sing my song.
Im goin round the world,
I got to find my girl, on my way.
Ive been this way ten years to the day, ramble on,
Gotta find the queen of all my dreams.

PS: An absolute waste of time trying my hand at abstract fiction. I know I can't do this well. Look at me pilfering lines from songs, movies, sitcoms and what not LOL Emotion is not me. I should stick to sarcasm.

Post Title: Led Zeppelin - Ramble On